A couple of photos

This ad running on TradeMe - just about sums up the "Kiwi Chick"

old clawfoot bath
Start price: $0.50 No reserve Closes: Fri 12 Jun, 9:18 am Listing #: 222635503 Starting bid: $Place Bid Auto-bid

RELISTED. WITHDREW LISTING ON UNDERSTANDING THAT BUYER WOULD BE THERE SAME AFTERNOON TO PICK UP. THEY WEREN'T. THAT WAS A WHILE AGO NOW. VERY ANNOYED AT PAYING AUCTION WITHDRAWAL FEES FOR PEOPLE WHO DON'T KEEP THEIR END OF THE BARGAIN.

PLEASE READ THE PART ABOUT FOUR GRUNTY GUYS BEING NEEDED TO LIFT THIS. TWO MIGHT DO IF REALLY GRUNTY. I AM A WOMAN, BUT AM WELL OVER SIX FOOT AND BUILT LIKE A BULGARIAN WRESTLER. I MANAGED IT WITH MY GUY BUT IT NEAR KILLED ME. I WILL BE VERY VERY VEEEERY UNIMPRESSED IF YOU'RE A TINY LITTLE FLOWER AND YOU TURN UP EXPECTING ME TO CARRY THIS FOR YOU.

Genuine old claw foot bath, date stamped 1941.

Sorry, no pic, I can't find my camera.

Surface condition is poor - the enamel is old and worn and impossible to scrub clean any more. Will need resurfacing.

It's the old coffin style, I believe it's called, like a big rectangle with flat edges, not rolled edges (but good for putting candles, bottles etc on). Very comfy and practical.

168.5 cm x 75.5 cm and about 38cm deep (not counting legs).

I am keeping the feet, very sorry, they are not for sale and will not come with the bath. The bath of course has places to screw in new feet.

Manufacturers of new baths recommend that four grunty guys move these things - they are cast iron and very heavy. In saying that, two of us managed to move this one.

Basically free for whoever wants to come and get it. Currently kept outside (since the weekend).
Please read the questions and answers for this auction.

Kitten vengeance

The NZ police are trying to trace the psycho-children; strangely they suspect this may be the start of something more serious and would like to nip it in the bud.

And you all thought NZ was such a nice place...

To counteract previous post

I know it's illegal to hits kids, but...

If my kid did this I would wallop them into next week. Future serial killers?



Two tiny kittens are slowly recovering after having paws cut off - believed to be by children using a knife or scissors.

The kittens survived their "horrendous" injuries, but are now facing major surgery to have a hind leg and part of a hip amputated.

The children, both aged under 10, giggled when they left the kittens at a Wellington Cats Protection League foster home, saying that the kittens' "feet fell off". But a vet's verdict is that the feet were "traumatically removed".

The children and their parents left the animal foster home without giving their names.

The committee member who runs the home has informed the SPCA, but a spokesperson says they cannot investigate without more information.

The eight week-old kittens are recovering well, but need to grow bigger before they have a hope of surviving the required surgery.

Both kittens are missing their left-hind foot. A veterinarian's notes say the leg of the smaller, black male "ends abruptly at the extreme distal tibia" the kitten's ankle.

The slightly larger black-and-white male was cut across the top of his foot his leg "ends abruptly across the proximal metatarsals".

The kittens were very quiet when the vet first saw them and the stumps were "swollen and inflamed". It was thought they might die from the trauma.

The volunteer who runs the home said for a long time her children could not bear to look at the kittens. "[The kittens] don't know they don't have feet. The cruellest thing is when you see it lying on its back and it's got its little stump and it's trying to scratch its chin.

"They're as friendly as - they try and climb up you and everything. It's horrible because you can feel the stumps on you... you can feel the jagged bit at the end.

"The other day we just heard [one of the kittens] scream and it had stood on a piece of kitty litter and it had stuck into its little stump ... it got infected."

The stumps have to be carefully bathed every day. The woman, who declined to be named, said she had taken in more injured cats in the last three months than in the past nine years put together.

"I just can't believe there's so many. They're all so horrendous," she said. "It just never seems to stop."

Other recent cases include a kitten whose tail was chopped off by a child with scissors. That kitten survived, but was deeply traumatised. "He was black and white and he's now turning grey." Another kitten was brought to her after being attacked with a hammer the owner had killed the rest of the litter, but this one somehow survived.

The volunteer found a third kitten in a box at her door, tangled so tightly in fishing line it was bleeding.

"The noise it was making... I cut the fishing line off and within minutes it died. My only consolation was it had stopped howling."

The league is about to launch a campaign for owners to get their cats desexed last year 500 operations were performed and this year it is determined to raise enough money to double that to 1000.

Recent high-profile incidents of animal cruelty have included the attack last month on a sheep by three Auckland teenagers who allegedly blew off its jaw with fireworks, and the abduction of a 14-year-old dog in Wellington which was then seriously injured when used as bait for fighting pitbull terriers.

The Cats Protection League will pay for the kittens' operations.

Donations or inquiries can be made at www.cpl-wellington.org.nz or posted to PO Box 12157, Thorndon, Wellington.

Beardy Wierdy

So, there I was sat in front of the TV watching "The Closer" on DVD, when I suddenly remembered my empty promise to blog teh weekend before last. Uh oh.

I immediately grabbed a pen & wrote down the things I would blog about this morning, which may go some way to explaining the randomness of this entry. Thus, the photo of Ben modelling his future beard-scratching Amish philosopher look.

First on my list is "Bad Scooter Parking". Last night I was out on a run with Gertie - exercise has been necessitated by a rather public trouser-button popping debarcle mid-class - wheezing away and carrying the obligatory bag o'poo when I came across a scooter parked on the path. Now, this scooter was not just on the pavement...oh no, it was parked across the path. Side on. No room either side for us pesky pedestrians. Nope. No choice but to go into the gutter.

I stopped & glared. Gert looked bemused. I considered pushing it over (childish). I seriously considered leaving Gertie's bag o' poo on the seat (too abstract). In the end I carried on and fumed quietly. God help that poor scooter owner should that happen when I have a pram & small boy to negotiate.

I mean come ON! Why oh why can't you park your precious scooter in the road like a normal person? (Please note, I am sitting here with teeth gritted in an attempt to restrain myself from "language" - the perils of parenthood no.1 = finding alternatives to swearing). For feijoa's sake!

In case you are wondering at my "scooter rage", I think it may be because I'm not taking the tablets any more, which means I am a danger to anyone within a 50-mile radius. Well, according to telly anyway. Have you noticed that lesbians & people who suffer from depression are always psychos on telly; so I am a double threat...watch out...

In reality a depressed lesbian is far more likely to bore you to death by analysing every aspect of their life ad infinitum.

Okay, that's today's installment. I'm saving my other exciting news for tomorrow (maybe), but I'll leave you with this - next week The Penthouse Cinema's "Babes in Arms" film choice is a film about a woman who has just finished a prison sentence for infanticide.

Adios!

Tired

I know, I know, I know....don't start with me, I'm tired.

And, no it's not because I am being kept awake by Ben yelling his head off, I'm just a bit tired.

But I will blog soon. Probably over the coming weekend.

Is that enough for you?

First dog snog

Yep. It's the first day of my new class, so I'm blogging because my tiny tiny brain can't handle the fact that I've committed myself to 2 hours of talking about the predynastic period (5000-3000BC)in Egypt.

And it's in the same crappy lecture hall I've had before where pillars obscure the view of the screens. Most irritating.

Quick quiz - is there any point in having your ipod on shuffle if you spend half your time grimacing & hitting fast forward?

However, on a lighter note it's interesting to see that the Kent police force have been told off for playing the Hi De Hi theme tune at high volume to disperse protesters. That is borderline torture.

On a less cheery note, our beloved Prime Minister, Mr Key, appears to be taking the interesting view that the best areas to cut costs during the recession is the environment & pensions. So, if we're lucky we'll survive having not quite enough money to buy all the useless crap we don't need, but we'll have f**ked the climate & starve to death as old folk. Magic. Can't wait.

Things starting to settle down in the domestic realm - Jo & I have negotiated a 3-day week, so Tuesday & Thursday are family days when we'll do exciting things like go to the zoo. Or watch DVDs rented from the library ("King of Kong" & "Mis Pettigrew Lives For A Day" on reserve), depending upon the weather and how skint we are.

I notice that the REAL IRA are up to no good again; over here people are going all White Supremacist, though I don't fancy their chances (have you seen "Once Were Warriors"?). Are we really heading back to the 1970s?

The 9 day working fortnight is being introduced here too. Basically every private company that has more than 100 employees can tell their staff to take every other Friday off (no pay) & the govt will pay the employee up to $62 (20 quid) to compensate.

Ugh. I give up.

All the fun of the fair!

So today is the annual Newtown Fair, which means a great big lorry/soundstage right outside and lots of goings on.

For some reason Green Street seems to be designated for selling old tat; on my return from this morning's dog walk I noticed we have the obligatory emo/stoner t-shirt stand, a snowcone stall, someone selling trendy babychairs and some junk stalls. Luckily,we also have the RadioActive soundstage (playing The Cocteau Twins a moment ago).

The remainder of Newtown's main thoroughfare is jam-packed with nick nacks, "art", clothing, FOOD, coffee, more soundstages etc etc. Even the French cafe has put out extra tables! The local school playground has transformed into a fairground and, of course, it's scorchio hot, so all the stall holders will get vicious sunburn.

We're venturing into the fray in about 20 mins. Wish us luck!

I'll be brief

Mostly because we are off on a great adventure - i.e. walking down to the Basin Reserve & back to enjoy the glorious weather, but I thought I'd treat you to a couple of photos of Ben looking 1.) windy 2.) stunned & monkey-armed.

And those of you who worry that I am neglecting my family in favour of being online please rest assured that Jo is more than capable of kicking me in the arse if needs be and baby/mother sleeping time is tres handy for office time! Plus, I'm working now on my new courses so am a little tied to the pc when I'm not walking dog/burping baby/cooking lunch or dinner/stopping noisy baby from waking up his mum etc etc etc. I promise that, despite the hoofing great tattoo on my arm, I am a responsible & sensible grown up person. In fact I realised today, whilst out on a 5km run with Gert, that I haven't even drunk more than 2.5 glasses of wine in one go for more than a year!

In fact, I think if it wasn't the tattoo thing, I'd be the most sensible person in the world.

Oh, and to save multiple explanations -

- tattoo = cover-up of old tattoo from 20 years ago
- it's a combination of winged heart/star/personal reminders
- given half the chance I'd do more (slow deep breaths Dad...it'll all be fine)
- Jo likes it
- Jo doesn't have tattoos; she's a belly piercing girl
- this doesn't mean I will let your travelling kids get tattoos whilst they are in NZ

Now we're going into the great blue yonder!

love
S

Just a quickie

No baby photos; but do feel free to join me in a couple of weeks at this delightful history course!

All is going well, have started to test out a routine that, fingers crossed, will have Ben sleeping through the night in no time at all (we've already got him down to waking up once a night).

Jan & Chris in Wellington for a few days last week and, despite my extreme knackeredness, we managed to gad about quite nicely. A brief summary of their visit:

Indian takeaway
Maranui Cafe
Mount Victoria
Dog walking
Haircuts
Sweet Mother's Kitchen
Te Papa colossal squid
Hurricanes cha cha cha!
Camper vans

What more can I say? Off to watch the Oscars red carpet now and comment on which "stars" I think should eat more pies.

laters gators

Oh You Handsome Devil...

Before I zonk out completely.

No photos yet, but after an epic battle the Ben-monster, also known as Wolfie Sparks, is finally here.

Jo went into labour at 4am on 13th February, we headed to the hospital at 12 noon, by 10.30pm (yes, PM) it was decided that the baby wasn't shifting and at 12.35am on February 14th he was delivered by casearean section.

He was 4.5kg/9.2lb, with blonde curly hair and freakishly big hands & feet.

Jo is knackered, Ben is knackered & I am knackered.

And at 1pm I am going to have a word with the receptionist who informed me that only "husbands" were allowed to visit between 1pm & 3pm.

Adios!

Oh I've thought of something to say!

We saw "Slumdog Millionaire" the other night.

It was okay, but really it's just a movie about how we gather pointless information mixed in with a slightly cliche lovers in peril story. Now I know alot of folk will chastise me for not thinking it was magical, but you must bear in mind that I like watching things like "Shoah", "Tell No One" & "Bambi", so there's no accounting for taste.

I can't even think of a title for this today.

I'm trying far far too hard to think of something to say that isn't "Still no baby", but it would appear that this is the only topic that anyone wants to discuss.

From this I can only assume that I am such a phenomenal hider of secrets and withholder of information that no one would ever assume that such a thing had happened from my demeanour alone. My semi-slacker part-time couple of hours a morning slackness job at the cafe is back on and everyday this week someone has said to me "Still no baby?" - do I really strike you as the type of person so dedicated to teh art of sandwich making that I wouldn't skip work to be with my newly first born child? Really? I think not.

So I put in this picture of a baby to keep you quiet.

Just to drive me even more insane the weather has turned to super rainy, but only when I go outside. Twice today I have been drenched - once collecting a parcel and once exercising the dog. Gert really needs more exercise today, but it is pissing down and I just can't face going out there and getting soaked again, plus she has dog day care tomorrow so she'll get tons of looning about then.

Jo is going nuthouse crazy because all she can do is one brief excursion a day before she's knackered and the rest of the time she's stuck indoors doing not very much. I know I should be relishing this pre-baby peace, but it would be alot more fun if Jo wasn't 41 weeks pregnant.

Oh, and she had the baby last week.


Just teasing.

I was going to be light-hearted

but then I foolishly read an article about the Australian bushfires, more specifically this paragraph -

Stories of lucky escapes and ghastly deaths emerged. Elderly couple Faye and Bill Walker and their son, who was in a wheelchair, had their car packed, key in the ignition and family dog in the back. But the fire beat them – their charred bodies were found metres away, inside the house.

I have the suspicion that if the coppers do catch the arsonists there's gonna be a lynchin'.

Still no baby

And I'm getting BORED!

Can you imagine what a great big pain in the arse I was every christmas/birthday? It's the bloody midwife's faut for saying she thought the Ben might be arriving a little early.

So now we are stuck (mostly) at home, though this morning we did venture to the beach and then to the library.

And all the dog does all day is sit and watch me in the desperate hope that I'll crack and take her for walk.

AND we've run out of Battlestar Galactica to watch. Bumflaps....

Is the UK broken?

My oh my, it's mighty snowy in your neck o' the woods isn't it?

I'm actually quite envious in a 'not really, but it looks pretty' way. That kind of cold would probably kill me now that I am a softy ex-pat, but I could get some decent mileage out of all my ski clothes.

No baby news yet, but I did just meet Monty (the 6 week old from across the street) who is destined to become Ben's best mate and/or arch enemy. He has sideburns already, flash git.

Off to write course book now. Allegedly.

It would appear that

I am boring.

Jo thinks I spend far too much time blogging/texting/tweeting. I have tried to explain that this is an almost unavoidable side-effect of working at home on a desk-based project, but I fear that maternity leave may be fraught with demands to "come and watch a DVD and stop being so boring".



Gert doesn't think I'm boring. She thinks I rock.

So there.

"My name is GYA and I am a first aider."

Two days of first aid training completed. Should you fall from a great height, collapse, crash your car, choke etc etc etc in my general vicinity I am now qualified to leap to your assistance and announce myself with a flourish.

I was a little disappointed that we didn't get to practise emergency tracheotomy or run along along a corridor with a prone victim on a trolley, but I was tested with the most magnificent scenario - a man carrying a heavy box has fallen down the stairs, possible broken pelvis, severe carpet burn on thigh, and has now been jumped on by a nosy cat causing him to go into anaphylaxis. You will be relieved to hear that he lived.

Quite a bizarre group too. Most interesting/entertaining was Andrey the Russian IT guy (well Kurgistan, if we're being pernickity), who looked disturbingly like David Walliams and said things like "When I was child I was digging for worms and I cut hand on broken glass - my father cleaned with vodka; this good?". At one point I was waiting for Jeremy Beadle to leap out, but then I remembered he was dead. So I assumed Jimmy Carr would be out there somewhere. He also started quite a fierce debate about how to treat poisoning as he was having none of the new fangled idea that making the poisonee throw up was daft and might kill them. Choking on vomit obviously not commonplace in Kurgistan.

And did you know they don't recommend using antiseptic on cuts these days; just a good rinse with clean water.

So...January 2010 Egypt I'll be ready for them. Fling yourselves off as many olde monumentes as you will, I will wrench you into the recovery position and introduce myself whether you want to or not.

In other news, the midwife (just typed midwaif...the Kate Moss of prenantal care) thinks Wolfie might be a couple of days early. Will let you know.

I'm off to define the role of royal women in 18th dynasty Egypt. Adios!